Trash Eaters

You can say this is about Sarah Palin and you wouldn't be wrong, but you wouldn't be entirely right, either.

A man waiting at a bus stop with his 10-year old son saw a reasonably well-dressed woman sitting on an open trash can (the kind with a small hole in the middle of a flat 8-inch rim that is covered in splatterings from whenever someone missed the center). He suggested that she might want to move, since there is plenty of space on the benches and that rubbish bin is filthy. She replied indignantly, "Well I for one don't consider myself too full of pride to touch the refuse of society." Even though he didn't want to take the bait, he couldn't help but defend himself in front of his son. "I don't consider myself too proud for that, I just-" "Then prove it!" she interrupted. An obese, grotesque individual had been waiting to deposit the remnants of their breakfast into the can. The man could have pointed out that her symbolic gesture of humility is ironically impeding this person, but he knew such a thing would be lost on her. Instead he took the bag from the person and ate all the contents, some of which were half-chewed or touching heavily saturated crumbled napkins. She shakes her head as she slides off the waste receptacle, depriving none of her surface area the privilege of wiping the filthy lid. She said, "You must not care much for our nation." Then she directs her attention to the man's son. "You want to see what it means to love America?" She reached into the bin and searched for the most questionable and moist morsel and pulled it out. The man said, "You really shouldn't eat that, you don't know when they last emptied that bin and you don't know what that it is." She crammed it into her mouth and took her time chewing it. "It doesn't matter, because it was made in the USA." She encouraged everybody to show their patriotism. There was plenty of garbage in the can, and they found a dumpster filled to the brim in the nearby parking lot. The man gave up discouraging everybody and just waited patiently for the bus and told his son that what they were doing was dirty and uncalled for. Once the bus arrived, everybody piled in. Before long, people started throwing up, the volume of which was in direct proportion to their patriotism. Eventually everybody was too busy vomiting to do anything else, and breathing room was becoming scarce. The man had fallen asleep, leaving the son to act on his own. Without a word the child began eating all the vomit.